#1 is Structure. Schedule for yourself a set time every day to work on the housework. Whether that be a "block" of time for 20 to 60 minutes, or cleaning a little bit every day, make sure its on a schedule. Keeping it at the same time every day will make it a habit, and make it easier to get it done. Something I like to do is have an hour block, and then set a timer for ten minutes in each room. You'd be surprised how much you can get done in ten minutes!
#2 is Clean When it is Dirty. A lot of moms I know get all stressed out over how often the windows are cleaned, how often the sheets get changed, or the walls get scrubbed. Relax!! Yes, there is a time when those things and many more need done, but trying to get it done once a day, week, or even month and those are the things that will drive you insane!! So, how do we handle it? Schedule, clean, and then rate how long it takes to get dirty. Then clean it. And you'll have a better idea of when to schedule it the next time around. Also, pay attention to your families habits. Obviously if you have toddlers or small children at home, your vacuuming needs are greater than a mom's who's kids are in school all day. If it's not dusty, don't dust it. If it's not dirty, don't clean it. And if it is, make the job a slave to your schedule, instead of becoming a slave to the job!
#3 is Hide the Evidence. This one is easy. Bins, baskets, drawers, cabinets. These are the tools of a successful mother! Nothing is easier than throwing the stuff that clutters your home into a bin or drawer. Label everything so you can find it later, and be sure that when the time comes to clean that zone, that you clean out the baskets and cabinets as well. Remember that clean is 10% perspiration and 90% perception!
#4 is the Art of Camouflage. When decorating your home, be sure to choose colors and fabrics that wear and wash well. Scotchgard is your friend! Avoid white! Make sure the colors and fabrics that don't wash well at least hide the dirt well!! And keep the bottom half of your walls painted with washable paint or darker colors to keep the scrubbing down to a minimum.
#5 is to Set an Ultimatum. I have a confession to make. Pretty much the only time my house gets 100% cleaned is when I am having a party. So, if the risk of having other people see your house a mess is a motivation for you to clean it, plan a party! Host a girl's night, or book club meeting. Have a special family dinner. Whatever will motivate you! The holidays are right around the corner!
#6 Foster Habits of Completion. Get into habits of cleaning up after yourself. When you unwrap something, throw away the trash right then. When you come into the house, hangup your jackets and coats. When kids walk into the door from school, make sure their backpacks, lunchboxes, homework, etc. gets put away in the proper places. Cleaning up the mess as you make it gets it done a lot quicker, and it never has a chance to make an appearance on the to-do list! Teaching this concept to your kids also makes housework a lot easier!
#7 and most importantly Enlist the Troops. At times we as moms figure that if we want it done right we have to do it ourselves. This however is not only a great injustice to ourselves, but also to our family members. How are our children going to learn how to be responsible citizens if they can't even keep a clean room? How will our husbands know how much to appreciate us if he doesn't have to pitch in once in a while? ;) Also, teaching all our kids basic home repair, car repair, cooking and sewing will help them, as well as us to be more self reliant. But in order to get them to do the work, they, like us, need some kind of incentive. The first incentive, of course, being to praise, praise, praise our kids!!! I was at a friend's house the other day visiting her and her new baby. Pretty soon the grandmother comes in to inform us that her four year old son is outside cleaning up the dog poop. Did he get praise when he came in? You better believe it!! But, occasionally they need a little more than just a pat on the back. So, we need to set our expectations and work with them to determine a reward system. You can't be complaining that all they do is watch t.v. when you haven't set forth the expectations! So come up with a system that is within their ability to achieve, while rewarding them with time with their friends, t.v. time, or even their allowance. The real world doesn't give us what we need just because we exist! Teach them this principle through example and hard work.
Our homework, and I mean OUR homework, is to come up with a chore chart for yourself. Think of all that absolutely has to be done in any given week. Take off what can reasonably be done by your children. Then take what is left and divide it among the days of the week. Don't be afraid to have days off, or to treat yourself with a "pajama" day! Plan what time of the day will work best for you as your standard "chore time" and wa-la! A workable chore chart! For a terrific idea on a kids chore chart that was referred to me by my homeschooler friend, that has completely transformed the way my kids do chores see the links below. Hannah also has some terrific ideas at her website for both you and your kids! So feel free to go there as well! Good luck and guess what! We are half way there!! Congratulations, you are now a Secure Mom! I hope that you are feeling much more confident in your momabilities and most importantly in you as a person! I know that even though I am not perfect in a single one of these days (-yet!) that I feel 100% more capable, more strong, and more confident than when I started this journey. Let me know how you are doing, and if I can help in any way!
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