Okay moms. We've talked about our thoughts, we've talked about our words. Now its time to talk about what I have decided to call the two A's. Attitude, and Action. These two tools can be a powerful source for good or bad. So today we are going to learn how to use them to make our homes a better place. And I know we all want that!
First, we have to check our attitude. Your state of mind is a powerful thing. Have you noticed that when you feel strong, confident, and positive that things seem to go great. The world is your oyster. You can accomplish anything! But the opposite is also true. If your feeling down, depressed, or weak then nothing seems to go your way. Kids misbehave, house seems to fall apart, you feel completely powerless. So, what do we do? Here are some tips that I have learned. I am not claiming to be good at any of these, because those of you who know me know it is a real struggle for me, but I hope that they can help you. Some are from other sources besides Hannah's book, but they are all good.
#1. When you wake up in the morning, before you even get out of bed, smile. Your brain doesn't know what is real. It only knows what you tell it. Smiling makes it believe that you are happy and releases the endorphins that make you feel on top of the world. So, even if you don't feel like it, just smile! :)
#2. Find a watch with a timer, an egg timer, or anything that will beep every hour. This will be your attitude check. Everytime it beeps check your attitude and your actions. If your a little off where you want to be, stop, think of a positive thought. Do some deep breathing. Stretch. All of this interrupts the negative and starts those endorphins again. Hannah does this every day.
#3. Live life on purpose! When life throws you bumps in the road, make a conscious effort to get over it. Focus on your vision. Take positive action. Focus on what you have already accomplished, instead of how far you have to go. Think of all the things you love about your kids or spouse instead of what they are doing to annoy you. Take control of your finances, instead of worrying about bills. The easiest way to push out the bad, is by focusing on the good!
#4 Acknowledge if other factors are involved. My therapist (Yes, I have one) calls it H.A.L.T. Are you hungry? Angry? Lonely? Tired? These are usually the four main reasons negativity starts to invade our thoughts, feelings and actions. So take care of them! If your hungry, grab a healthy snack. If your angry, take a time out to calm down. If your lonely, call your spouse or a good friend. If your tired, take a short nap, go for a walk, or sit down with a good book to rest a minute. Once these needs are met, you'd be surprised at how much better you feel.
Now lets talk about our actions. As you can see above, our attitude drives our actions. Once our attitude is powerful and empowering, our actions become productive and positive. Hannah gives seven ways to make our actions work for us instead of against us, which I have listed and commented on.
#1 Piggyback your tasks. She says that while you are doing one thing, you can throw in another smaller task. While fixing your kids lunch, rinse the breakfast dishes. After washing your hands in the bathroom, wipe off the counters. When we walk through a room, we can pick up a few toys or some trash on our way. You can easily do much more in the same amount of time every day.
#2 Take baby steps. Don't bite off more than you can chew!! If you set your sights to high, you are just setting yourself up for failure. You eat an elephant one bite at a time. So don't focus on the elephant, focus on the first bite. Be in this moment. Accomplish this moment. Live in this moment. In the book, Hannah calls them magic moments. We don't have chunks of time to do things. We have moments. Make them count!
#3 Have fun! Don't want to exercise? Put on some fun music and dance around with your kids. Don't want to clean up? Make a game out of it. See how much you can do in one minute, 30 seconds, or even ten! Life is to short to hate what you do. Find the fun in everything you do!
#4 Be selective. Don't expect perfection. Shove stuff under the bed or couch until you can get to it. Only mop the dirty parts of the floor. If you can learn to take a few shortcuts, you will do things more effectively. If what you want is perfection, it is much harder to get motivated to do it. Be satisfied that the toys are picked up and save the vacuuming for later. Be selective.
#5 Build it in blocks. Set blocks of time in order to get a task done. If we know there is a finishing point, it makes it easier to get started. I heard a talk on KBYU one night that said to just do a task for ten minutes. At the end of that time, I can stop. Or, if I am now feeling motivated, I can keep going. Or set a number of things that need picked up, or a number of dishes to wash. Doing things in small amounts of time still gets them done!
#6 Reward yourself. Sometimes we just need incentive. It's easy to fold all the laundry if you know there is a bubble bath waiting for you when your done. It's easy to vacuum the house if you know there's a good book on your nightstand. Put off what you want to do now as a reward when you finish a task. Just because we are moms doesn't mean we are serving a prison sentence! Take time for you!
#7 Do it now! If you see something that needs to be done, stop making excuses and get moving. Hannah says not to let the work pile up. How often have you taken the clothes out of the dryer and piled them on the couch or the bed. How much harder is it then to start folding them? If you do it right away, the tasks are much smaller, and they get done!
Okay, so now for our journal exercises. Yesterday we wrote down four categories: Home, Health, Family, and Life. Today in these categories write down areas of common problems in your attitude and actions. Follow that with ways to use the action skills above. Then do it! You should also have some kind of system for organizing your tasks. Your schedule, calendar, all the many lists we as moms keep. Have a binder or planner where you can keep all of this in one place. Now write down some of the action steps on your calendar so that you don't let them slip by. I have down to start walking my dogs in the morning after I send the kids off to school. This way we all get exercised! Remember, too, to keep it fun and reward yourself!
One last thought. Think creatively and keep your actions in line with your vision. Go through your list and visualize yourself doing them and how you feel when they are done. Keep your thoughts positive and feel the power that flows through you as you accomplish each one of these goals. I know you can do it! Get started now!
P.S. Don't forget to leave me your comments on how you are doing. We are accountable to eachother!
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